Simon pauses at the doorway, catching the bright sound of Kaylee's laugh. Walking around the corner, he spots Kaylee and River sitting on the walkway, dangling their legs over the edge like small children.
Their heads are bent together, most likely talking nonsense as they swing their feet back and forth. He steps closer and they turn toward him.
"Ah, my two favorite girls," he says as they grin at him. Kaylee's smile is pure sunlight but River's happy expression is what really warms him.
"Hey, Simon."
"Am I interrupting?"
"Of course not," Kaylee says as River shakes her head. "We were just talking."
"What were you talking about?" Simon leans an elbow against the railing, standing beside River.
"Schooling," Kaylee replies. "We were talking about classes and teachers."
River tilts her head straight back, looking up at him. "And favorite subjects. I was telling Kaylee about ballet class."
That was always River's favorite subject. She could perform quantum physics equations with ease, but it was the simple beauty and self-control of ballet that made her laugh and beam.
"River is very a graceful dancer," Simon says, noting that River seems surprisingly lucid today. Part of Simon is already tabulating the medication she's had this morning. Unfortunately, it's the same set of injections he's had her on for the last week. Nothing new, nothing different.
He leans down and runs a hand through River's soft hair. It's best to enjoy River's moments of rationality while they last, but he wishes he understood what made her sensical. "And what was your favorite, Kaylee?"
Kaylee pulls a face, twisting her sweet mouth into a grimace. "I wasn't much of one for schooling."
"Really?"
"Schooling's just words and numbers and things that are obviously true." Kaylee's quick smile returns. "Schooling just don't make sense. It ain't like machines."
"Ah." This mechanically gifted girl should be in an engineering college. If Simon was still a surgeon, instead of a fugitive, he'd arrange for her to study engines to her heart's content. It's a thought he frequently has, but it's a useless wish. He knows it will never happen; he'll never have that level of success and influence again.
His thoughts are interrupted when River's hand sneaks up to squeeze his. Glancing down, he notices the bones of her wrist. She's still too thin for him to be comfortable. He should remember to keep an eye on that, he thinks as he rests a hand on River's shoulder, feeling the angles of bone under his hand.
River drops his hand and turns back to Kaylee. "Simon's used to be biology."
Kaylee's eyes widen. "Yeah?"
He pulls his hand back from River's slight shoulders. "That's why I became a doctor."
"Shiny."
"He used to love his biology classes," River continues, sounding like the same precocious child from Simon's memories. "Back when he was in Upper School, he had to do his first dissection."
"Upper School?" Kaylee asks with a small frown.
The question seems so obvious to Simon that he's struck silent for a moment.
River counts out on her fingers. "First there's Junior School, then Lower School and then Upper School."
She glances across the deck, drifting away from the conversation. Simon speaks, trying to draw her attention back. "I did my first dissection when I was…" Simon pauses, thinking. "I would have been thirteen."
Kaylee nods. "So what was the dissection?"
"A frog. He talked about it for days." River smiles and Simon swallows, suddenly remembering that class. He'd been so excited at the time, watching the chemically slowed heart beating, the tiny lungs expanding and contracting. Cutting it open just to see, just to look, just because he was curious. Stepping back, he grips the railing until his knuckles turn white.
River is leaning towards Kaylee, and thankfully doesn't notice him. "He was so excited about it, about understanding how bodies go together, how they work."
"Like seeing inside an engine," Kaylee burbles and River nods, her dark hair flinging around.
"I'm going to go visit the Captain," Simon says, edging away from their conversation. The girls barely notice him walk away.
"I've never touched a frog. Do you think it was slimy?"
"Frogs aren't slimy…" River replies as he slinks around the corner.
Simon takes a few deep breaths, trying not to think of that frog spread out on his lab table; trying not to think of River strapped down and cut open, again and again, just to see. Slicing and cutting and stabbing, just because they could.
Because she had no one to protect her. Because no one bothered to protect her until it was too late. Turning on his heel, Simon heads back to the medical bay. It can't hurt to look at River's medications one more time. Maybe it had something to do with the doses building up in her system….
As he walks across the cargo bay, River waves down at him and calls out, "Kaylee's going to teach me to play leap-frog."
Kaylee laughs and nods. "You wanna play, Simon?"
Simon forces himself to smile and wave back. "Maybe later."
The End